I love you can mean a lot of diverse things, but in a relationship between a man and a woman, it can have huge emotional weight.
Our confusion about these words comes from our too casual use of the word love. We love everything. We love clothes. We love shoes. We love cars. Until we’re done loving everything, we’re not certain what the word means anymore.
I love you – Non-Romantic Love
- Friendship love – when we’re saying I love you to a friend, we’re actually saying that the respective person it’s important to us. We value him in our life and we think about him. We always want the best for him.
- Parental love – when my mother says I love you to me, she is saying it from all her heart. She tells me that I’m a miracle to her and she will do anything to support my happiness. The love of a mother to her child is unique.
- Generic love – when I say “I love you” with somebody with whom I don’t have a close relationship, I refer that I love them in a generic way, the way I love every other human. I really want everyone’s highest good. They may not be significant to me in a personal way, but they are significant to me in a general way.
I love you – Romantic Love
Romantic love is the love that often gets us confusing. When you say I love you to your partner, what do you mean?
When you have a pure love for your partner, you are saying I love you as a true gift, with no expectations attached. The term love is clean and spontaneous, you are deeply connected.
But the expression of love can be manipulative. You can say I love you only when you want something like attention, money, forgiveness etc. If your heart is not full with love when you say these words you really say “I need you”. This is the need of being loved.
Because we have only one word for love, you have to be very clear on what you mean when you say I love you.
So beautiful and so vital, but so hard to say it! “ I love you ”. Simple, short, just three words so unimportant taken separately but which require so much courage to be put together.